ic inbox ( ruby city ) Ⅰ

[digiorno]

buongiorno! sorry i missed you; i'll happily get back to you as soon as i'm done with whatever business i'm on. leave a message!

( text | voice | video )

⇦ ● ⇨

Comments

[lapidarius]

I'm sure you're the kind of overly-prepared person everyone would be lucky to have on a long trip.

We talked this time, yeah. It's

[...]

okay. I think that we'll manage.

[digiorno]

Good. I continue to be right about everything. (*•̀ᴗ•́*)و ̑̑

[lapidarius]

You're surprisingly good at that. It's always impressive. ξ◥▶◀◤♡

[digiorno]

It's not surprising at all. I am perfect in every way.

[lapidarius]

Absolutely flawless, of course.

[digiorno]

Of course.

Kakyoin, what do you think about selfishness?

[lapidarius]

I think it's a pretty broad term, presented that way. What do you mean?

[digiorno]

I was just thinking about it while I was out here, that's all. In the abstract. Is it good, is it bad, is it nothing.

[lapidarius]

It's not that easy to categorize. I think that people might do kind or cruel things for selfish reasons, or maybe they just have a warped view on the idea. What one person thinks is 'selfish' might be what another thinks is completely normal.

[digiorno]

What do you think is selfish, then?

[lapidarius]

I don't think that I can give an accurate answer for that.

[digiorno]

Why not?

[lapidarius]

Because I think that I am the kind of person with a skewed perspective on the idea.

[digiorno]

Well, so am I. I think that makes your opinion even more valuable, really.

[lapidarius]

[. . .]

I think it isn't selfish to want people to care about you.

Even if it feels like it must be.

[digiorno]

I think I believe that.

But that's really an answer to a different question, isn't it? I know some things aren't selfish. I just don't know what is.

[lapidarius]

I'm still trying to learn that one.

And I'm not too sure what would be selfish if not that.

[digiorno]

What about wanting to not care about some things? Trying not to?

[lapidarius]

I don't know. I guess it'd depend on what one didn't want to care about.

[digiorno]

Things that hurt. Emotionally, not physically.

[lapidarius]

If it's a matter of not wanting to be in pain, it would be difficult for me to call that 'selfish' at all.

[digiorno]

Even if it comes at the expense of other people? Shutting yourself off like that.

[lapidarius]

That's

it's not easy to say. There are a lot of things I'm trying to figure out lately, and that might be one of them. I don't believe that it's selfish to want to not be in pain, but when it comes to something like that I don't know how to define it in terms of what is or isn't 'selfish'.

I can only say what I think is 'better', and in that case I know that it's better to hurt with other people than to hurt all on your own.

[digiorno]

That's true. Hurting with other people and not alone, I mean. Honestly I don't know if I even could stop feeling any of the things I feel no matter how much I wanted to, but I wasn't sure if even just the thought of it was the bad kind of selfish.

Dio found out that I was upset about something and he said I should be more selfish. So it's something I'm thinking about. Him and me and selfishness and what it all means. Because I think at the very least that he's right that I can't do what I'm doing forever.

I don't need an answer or anything like that. I was just looking for perspective.

[lapidarius]

I don't think that either of us can. Keep going like this, I mean. I've been trying not to be what I perceived as 'selfish', and it's just turned me into kind of a mess. I keep shutting myself off like you said, and I don't think that's the right approach.

Jojo was pretty upset when we finally talked about this whole thing. He said something like 'it seems like nobody hurts you more than you hurt yourself.' I'm going to have to change something. Somehow. I don't really know how or what just yet.

[Oh, good. Let's talk about Captain Helpful, Dio Brando.]

...How's he doing?

[...an attempt was made.]